Closed Eyes

I thought I saw with open eyes
Into graceful skies,
But they were closed.
My body froze,
Not from the cold
Of winter’s night,
But from fake gold.

What a fool the mind cries!
Daylight flies,
One choice to make
For dignity’s sake
To lead away from tomorrow.
Courage I’ve never had,
Fear begins to burrow.

What a tale I could weave
Under midnight’s eave
From bygone days
While the soul decays.
I hadย followed advice I respected,
Had I been deceived?
Not knowing how I’d be affected.

(c) Bret Sears – 2010

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About poetryoftheasian

I've been writting poetry for only a few years as a little hobby, and have had a few published in a small poetry contest. I currently want to write more and improve as much as I can. Any tips or feedback would be much appreciated. It is possible that after a few weeks I will revise parts of some of my poems.
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35 Responses to Closed Eyes

  1. Pingback: Thursday Poets Rally Week 45 (June 2-8, 2011) | Promising Poets' Poetry Cafe

  2. Jingle says:

    magical…
    enjoyed the imagery very much.
    you are able and enjoy it.

    Happy Rally.

  3. Beautiful. Sometimes the only way we learn is by suffering the pain of our mistakes. The pain from them is the only way we really do learn the lesson.
    Great prose.

  4. meiro says:

    Love this one, great piece.

  5. Julian Javier the Cyber Mushroom says:

    what a wonderful piece! awesome phrases about the foolish decisions of man since time immemorial.

  6. Great poem! Your content is such a valid story of how we are human! Sometimes we unconsciously allow ourselves to be led astray! Who can say this has never happened to me? I think your poem is really beautiful! Cindy

  7. Rajlakshmi says:

    from our faults we learn …
    beautifully penned.
    //My body froze,
    Not from the cold
    Of winterโ€™s night,
    But from fake gold.//
    Loved the imagery.

  8. so trusting and gullible in a lot of things. so human. ;]

  9. Paulami says:

    the last imagery is pretty cool. to weave under midnight’s eave..

  10. The first stanza really speaks to me, oh I have been there its a strange phenomenon when we are congratulating ourselves and boasting about being on the right path we are on the wrong path. It seems we are only on the right path when we are right in the moment neither bragging or lamenting, just there with whatever arises

  11. poetryroad says:

    Words are woven smoothly together and the message is almost magical.

  12. genebrother says:

    Very nice poetry
    Too each may wisdom prevail

    Genebrother

  13. Loved the thought about fear burrowing.

  14. Alcina says:

    Blind faith can surprise highly..sometimes leads to a moment full of agony and the other could throw us into a dreamworld..
    This is how life goes on..

    Nicely penned down!

    Alcina

  15. Leonargo says:

    I love the rhythm of this poem and it has a strong beat to it in my mind. I feel you could go on further with this perhaps, but that is only my opinion. Do with this great piece as you like. ๐Ÿ™‚

  16. Great imagery…well done!

  17. A.B. Thomas says:

    A great creation with a slick message within, enjoyed it a lot!

  18. Ankoku Hikaru says:

    Love, Love, Love.
    Great Job

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